I am swinging between hope and despair. Since the beginning, I take a situation to its extremes - good and bad - and that is how I think about where I need to go. That's just my nature. Since things are not working out for me on the job-front, I frequently think about bankruptcy, going back to the job I hate, being the object of ridicule, etc (the "despair" phase). And then, while travelling on the Bombay local trains, I see a 70-year old man, carrying heavy cargo, still in the daily pursuit of his bread - that I wonder - I have been given a higher pedestal than him so that I can avoid the daily pursuit of livelihood and instead do so much more, with the luck of being born in a much better place and time. Essentially, the 70-year old man got a raw deal, and I got much more than him. Should I be thinking of giving it all up and just 'existing', or should I use the higher pedestal to work even harder and go on the path I am passionate about? (the "hope" phase).
I know the swinging will continue, but I hope it does not result in wasted time on pursuits not worthy of the luck I have been blessed with. Maybe next time, I will be born as the guy who lugs around heavy cargo even till the age of 70, all to get my daily bread.
