What I want to do versus What I can do

I went for a meeting with a HR person at a TV company. She asked me what I want to do and I said I want to be in the "business of content" - it was a broad brush-stroke since I did not want to (nor could I) be too specific and rule myself out of possible openings in other areas. She said I should do what really interests me - and I thought to myself - that's nice. Here's a person who can understand me. So, I said I want to be on the Production side.

And she said I dont have relevant experience there! WHAT? I know that, but you asked me what I really want to do!

So, then I said let me do what I've done before - which is something on the Sales side.
And she said if its not what I want to do, then I wont enjoy it! WHAT? I know that, but then I'll never be able to get in!

Each time I meet someone new, I get stuck in this Catch-22 situation. And whether I go prepared (which doesnt help!) or take it as it comes, the result is the same - it's almost like people who dont want to help are looking for a reason to not help! Why? Just introduce me to the functional heads and let them decide! Jeez!!

Karma and Intentions

I have begun to believe in Karma. And I feel sad that only actions are judged, never intentions. So, if I dont get a chance to do a good deed, am I not eligible for good things to happen to me? Even if I never wished anyone any harm and always wished the best for others? Dont intentions matter at all?
I feel the current joblessness streak is a result of Karma...either I've done bad things to people (not true) or I've not done enough good things to people (could be true, but it was never intentional). So, what exactly is going on here? When do I get a job? When I go out of my way to do good things (but then, that's like bribery, isnt it?)?

Doors slam shut

I am tired of doors being slammed shut on my face. No recruiter wants to take a chance on me. None. They want someone who's done the same thing, to yet again do the same thing. I dont get it. I think talent, hard-work and genuine passion in the work is at the top of the list of anyone I would hire in my company - but the recruiters are scared shitless and want to hire 'safe bets'.

I watch multitudes of people walk in and out of offices, trudging along, hating their jobs and yet doing it mindlessly. I made a choice to stop doing that and go after something I really love. But its so damn difficult to convince anyone that I can do better than most people they have in their teams. Because I am committed, I can slog my arse off, and I am talented and I am passionate. Looks like these things dont matter. Only 'relevant experience' does. Shitty, relevant, mindless experience.

The Mahabharata

It is an epic. A story that is the source for all other stories. A creation of God and man. A balance between spirituality and practicality/reality. A book for life.

Underestimating financial-fuel and external factors

When I set out to pursue what I really wanted to do, I severely underestimated 2 things: external factors to work in my favor and the financial-fuel i needed to keep walking down the path that I had chosen.
Being prey to the loud voices of 'take the plunge', 'go for it', 'believe in yourself', etc were fine to the extent that they convinced me of the decision to enter the films/entertainment stream. But what I did not listen to were the voices of reason that asked me to conserve enough cash to keep the financial-fuel pipeline running. Depleting cash reserves may just push me back to the path I have left (at least for the time-being...and I am not happy about that).

Another under-estimated factor - external environment.
I want to do a lot of things, but cannot do it in isolation. I need a job in the film/entertainment industry, and that means that a lot of people who I dont know (and who dont know me) have to take a chance on me. They have to believe in me - which is a very difficult thing for anyone to do. And then, their CEOs, HR, and all the other people have to believe in me too. And then the company needs to have a job that I can do well in which is then dependent on the external business environment, etc. So, a lot of external factors have to fall in place for me to get the initial success on my chosen path.

Next time around, I will be careful and work on these things in parallel. There is no sequential path to success...parallel processing is important.